没有housemate的第七天，晚

Even though Kampar is a boring place but i don't feel so whenever i'm with u girls...i can ran room to room just to disturb u all...even though we are in our own room but at least i know u all existence and u all are there in the same house...this wasn't those normal weekends, sem breaks or internship time...because whenever i'm going back there you all aren't there anymore...you all aren't going to be there again...i misses the laughter,voices and the joyfulness of you all....

~miss you~

Esther and mine 1st bday celebration

没有housemate的第五天,晴

I'm trying to be as strong as i can...
Mentally and physically..
Because if pieces of memories didn't come,dreams is the thing that will...
Recently my dreams seem like so clear and i still can remember it...
Everything like it just happened..a few hours ago only..
Wake up and clear myself up..nope it happened long time ago...
Maybe some just won't happen at all..
Dream is something wonderful and cruel...
It gives u a wonderful 1 and when u wake up u have such feelings to overcome...
A feeling to overcome another one....
A feeling to cure another one...
A feeling to console another one...
So eventually i need a strong EQ...a super strong 1...

1st mooncake festival celebration together

没有housemate的第四天,晴

It's Christmas Eve le~

Where is the mood?

Where is the celebration?

Where is whatever?

When i wanted the time to slow down it flies...

Now i want it to fly it slows down...

Mentally problem or itz a game to me?

Quit playing game with me...

I'm trying to go through everyday with a strong body,mind and soul...

Bless me~

1st Breakfast preparation together~

没有housemate的第二天，晚

went to sing K in the morning just wish to shout out....
somehow it just didn't stopped things keep on coming into pieces again...
oh gosh~how long do i need to overcome it?
images of 175...the surrounding,and the interior...
i'm just too stubborn to make things keep on recalling in my mind...
no reason why i even can seems like "predicting" my life when i sem opens...
house,room,people,surrounding...u name it,i think of it...are all changing...
just like i'm having a new lifestyle next sem onwards...
like it or hate it that's the thing i have to face it....
how fast will 2years be?

Our 1st Ipoh Trip outcome

没有housemate的第一天，晚

officially is 2nd day but unofficially would be 1st because i'm still awake~

i don't know what to blog....i just wish to blog...

i don't know what to type out and put it into words....

i don't know it will takes how long but i know it does need time...

i tried not to cry but i did somehow for a few times....

i'm weak and trying to be strong as i can...

i'm trying and trying and trying....

don't worry about me as it just being me~

1st celebration together

PASCAL

I love it~

I really wish to own one long time ago~

He is just so cute in Rapunzel~

Ok i know reality i can't find such cute one~

Yet i still want to own it~

Thankz~

you all are just something special in my life...

gonna miss you~!!

thanks for these 3years...

thanks for all the memories...

thanks for everything...

sorry for all the mistakes i did...

sorry for being who i am...

-mush-

Blesses

At this age of mine i'm not really that healthy as i thought i'm..

Cholesterol,low blood,backache,strange rashes and the latest beginner of kidney prob..

Cold drinks,teh tarik,watermelon ---> NO

Both families history makes these generation of ours need to care for our health.. 

Will one day i'll get the same dread disease like my grandma and mom?

Worried is all i have past week...

What can i do but just wait the day to go back hometown...

Assignments just freaking loaded....

Imagination is all i had as well...

Images and memories of my grandma just appear...

No idea why i applied it towards my mom...

Maybe is phobia...

Scared one day scene will repeat...

The scene how just a less than an hour...

All i saw is my grandma that didnt breath anymore...

It's fresh in my mind no matter how...

Dear Lord...

I never baptist to anyone of YOU...

But i do wish that everyone stay as healthy as they could...

I willing to give them my health...

Just everyone is happy and healthy then its sufficient for me...

Because i'm born to be kind to others and cruel to myself...

I admit i'm...

Long Journey

I keep seeing people graduates...

Congratz...

To ex and future graduates...

Me,myself still got 2years to go...

Honestly i feel the tiredness...

I hate the process...

Yet i have to accept it....

Yet i have to try my best to go thru it...

The image just said it all....

Will i have it when i need it?

Footprints in the sand

My journey is just like a passerby...

And

You are the beach that full with sand....

Your time and  memories are the waves...

Did i managed to leave footprints in the sand?

Did you just wash it away?

Sometimes i don't wish to look back...

But...

I just can't resist it and looked back...

Maybe sometimes i do care...

No matter how perfect a person is there is some imperfect...

No matter how cheerful a person is there is some sadness in him/her...

No matter how strong a person is he/she still need a shoulder to lean on...

Life's Brief Candle ~ Shakespeare

Tomorrow

and tomorrow,

and tomorrow;

Creeps in this petty pace from day to day;

To the last syllable of recorded time

and all our yesterays have lighted fools,

the way to dusty death.

Out, out, brief candle!

Life's but a walking shadow;

A poor player

that struts and frets his hour upon the stage

And then is heard no more;

It is a tale

told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,

Signifying nothing.

BackPacking

Something that crossed my mind....

This sem break going to be a lonely one...

All the plans are just being crush....

End up i'm alone back hometown...

Don't wish to go back that early....

Who willing to carry me as a burden for them for holidays?

Suddenly wish to go somewhere alone...

Without acknowledgement of anybody...

Lying to my parents...

Just me alone since that is what it begins with...

Eveyone got their own busyness... 

Everyone got their own planning for holiday...

the question is what if something happens to me?

memory loss and there's a new chapter of my life...

haha...just like watching a drama...

gosh~

so the question is should i or shouldn't i...

but i think the possibility is kinda high...

just follow the flow~

woke up le~

heartbeats abnormal~

yea itz scary....

i paused for a moment and asked...

where am i?

i didn't turned back the time right?

the feeling and situation so familiar...

nope i still at sept 2010...

my heart still beating very fast....

still calming myself down...

Don't ask me as i don't know what I've dreamed ... 

tried to relax thru "hillsongs"...

not working...so here i am...

sleep or not?

it falls le~

WHERE ARE YOU ALL?

WHY far from the eyes near to the heart....?

WHY spiritually...?

hope you all having a sweet dream...

ME?

i wish i had but not for today....

In DArk

Totally not in the mood for exam...

Totally can't find what i've lost...

I'm tired and really don't wish to care of anything for a moment...

But exam is near...i just can't ignore it...

Dad said try my best to get higher than previous CGPA...

My back pain is irritating me...

Wish to pull out all the veins at the back to makes me senseless...

I felt lost...

I can't find what i want...

I can't find a place that can brighten me up...

I can't find people to talk because i even don't know what i want...

I just felt myself a zombie...

Alive yet dead...

Did a very "chong dong" action to follow Lili's car to KL...

I just want to runaway...

But realized KL wasn't the place i should hide...

I wish to go further...

Get lost and disappear for sometime... 

I wish somebody will by my side...

Anyone and whoever...

Just don't have to talk and let me feel the existence...

Maybe i felt lonely at the same time...

Just a not in a good shape Mushroom....

Black Sheep~

At MidValley waiting for time to come...

Damn tired but i think kinda worth it...

Somehow...

Early morning drove back....

Damn sleepy....

Have to speed back with 140km/h..

Oppz over the limit i can drive...

Sorry...^^!!!

Was shocked to know a news from my mom early in the morning...

Was disappointed to know it...

Trust is the thing i put on him...

Trust is the thing he used to betray me or us...

What can i say?

What can i do?

Give him another chance and trust him again?

Is it must be a black sheep in a family no matter what?

What can i say anymore?

Just hope for changes in him and lead him back to the right path~

Maybe

When growing older and older will felt that some places just doesn't belong to me anymore....

Maybe due to people around aren't the same at all...

Maybe i just don't accept the fact that people do leaves when they grow...

Maybe i doesn't belong to the place at 1st...

New environment always takes time for me to suits myself in there...

When things are being fitting in, there are changes...

Is it wrong to put wrong type of feelings and seriousness towards some situations...

Never put more than the percentages that can hurt myself...

I won't denied that sometimes neither a place makes me comfortable...

I kinda lost when i really want a place to go...

Maybe places with people i wish to be with...

Maybe places that only with them will warm me up and i feel protected..

Maybe all this while i'm just living in the dark...

Never take the courage to face the brighter world...

Maybe is time to walk out...

Maybe is time to build a stronger me...

Love Will Keep Us Alive

我知道 不幸的事情比他人更糟
我知道 把你當成出气 工具不好
我知道 我知道如果对你好
想個宝 不胡闹 你会不会不在不在计较
我知道 你想依赖 But make you cry
Just say goodbye 也許你不會在 try
我知道 我知道 这样会让你down
我知道 Lets make another round listen now

Baby Baby 不要气馁
Baby Baby 我陪你狼狈
如果你伤悲 我会为你流泪
也许也许 你会自卑
不用担心 我跟你受罪
这样你就 不会一个人流泪

But I Don't Wanna Let You All Alone in The Darkness World
我不愿意看到你迷失自己的灵魂
如果你是失落我会永远在你身边

But Yes I Want Is You To Be The Girl That can Stand All Alone
不必为任何人生活你也会很快乐
我会在你身边守护你到永远

Rap
你听着 你听着 我会陪你度过
不会让你难过 这只是必须经过的错
放弃你的人是他配不上你
这种人我们三人三对眼睛都看他不起
不必为这些事情让你的家人一起担心
这里还有很多爱你的人挺你陪伴着你
社会还有很多东西等着你去 不要放弃
自暴自弃 这不是一个过去
打开电脑脸书里 实在太多帅哥美女
那么我介绍我自己 我是Monkey D

But I Don't Wanna Let You All Alone in The Darkness World
我不愿意看到你迷失自己的灵魂
如果你是失落我会永远在你身边

But Yes I Want Is You To Be The Girl That can Stand All Alone
不必为任何人生活你也会很快乐
我会在你身边守护你到永远

作曲Composer : DannyOne温力铭
作词Lyricist: DannyOne/ Monkey.D
编曲Arrangement : BOT@Mo Sound
制作人Producer : DannyOne温力铭
制作助理Executive Producer: BOT@Mo Sound
吉他Guitar: BOT@Mo Sound
和声Backing Vocal: Ester May
录音师Recording Engineer: BOT@Mo Sound
录音与混音室Recording and Mixing Studio : Mo Sound
OP : Sony Music Publishing Sdn.Bhd.

I super like this song by 摩斯特 • DA.MON.STER

Just want to share..^^

Sick

I lose a war le....

Fever+flu+cough...

At 1st just coughing...

After overnight at Kerina's place flu and fever just pops up...

Felt so sick during midnight...

Felt my body so hot and so suffering...

Sleeping with my jacket and blanket also felt cool...

In the morning...ermm...

In the afternoon specifically...

Kerina fetch me to consult a doctor...

There goes rm32 of mine...

Need to drive back Kampar...

So I keep telling myself must at least be strong till i reach Kampar...

As soon as i reached...

Went to fetch my groupmates to my house...

Then i straight away take a nap...

Kerina said my eyes are red...

Not a nice weekend after all..

Besides sitting at Starbucks for 6-7hours..

lOl

Sometimes

Sometimes not i wish to be alone...

Just that i'm learning to be alone...

I have gone thru too many ppl leaving in my life....

Yet i still haven't really learn and accept it...

Sometimes not i don't wish to talk...

Just that i don't know the limitation that i can speak...

Don't wish the situation suddenly turn to so quite...

As i'm not a good communicator but a good listener...

Sometimes not i don't wish to make decision...

Just i wish everyone is happy with their choices...

Not purposely follow what i chose/want... 

There are still a lot of things need to be learn...

A lot of things need to be let go...

Not to hold a tight fist but letting it go slowly...

Make a lot of mistake in life so that will learn from it...

Go through a lot of heart breaks so that can be more tougher..

Friends can be forever....

But impossible for them by my side forever...

When i thought i'm growing with a situation...

But the truth is as i'm growing the fear towards that situation grows as well...

Maybe i should say it this way...

"You" might by my side and grow with me...

BUT i'm the owner to "You"...

I'LL try my best to lead "You" rather than "You" ruining my days...

* "You" = fear *

Forever can't finish assignments....

My brain cells keep on working only...

Can't really sleep well as keep on thinking ideas only 

My back keep aching... 

Wish for a long term holidays with friends....

Nice Weekend

1st of all never thought will be that lucky to won the tix...

It was an amazing show that worth to watch eventho is pay for the tix..

Too bad my memory card not enough memory...

If not i'll record the entire show down...

Yesterday was a tiring day...

Can i take it as a bad day as well...

Yea "BAD" eventho is my B'DAY...

Went to Clearwater for the briefing and was brought to go around the resort...

Sweat and thirsty like hell....

Otw to Ipoh the car something wrong...

Otw to Ipoh got lost as a Ipoh girl is a "lou chi"...=.=

Check and repaired my car like taking for hours....

There goes rm129 of mine....

Purse totally empty yet still need to eat dinner...

Went to Parade MP for dinner...

Drove back Kampar as fast as i could as i'm freaking tired....

Tired yet can't get to sleep so just do some assignment till 1stg... 

Forget about those bad stuff...

Still blasting with Da.Mon.Ster songs...

Here some of mine and theirs pics....

GREAT GROUP!!!!

Simple and nice stage

MORE at:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=242411&id=681121284&ref=mf

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=681121284#!/album.php?id=358189659757&aid=189352&s=0&hash=161458d152ac46208206b6186d0dd26e

Bad Dream

Had one last night...

It looks and sounds so real...

I'm so sad when i woke up...

It just broke my heart just like a couple just 分手。。

haha...crap right...

I just don't know how 2 describe my feeling...

I'm scare and worry that day will come...

I'm scare and worry it will happen in reality...

I'm scare and worry yet i'm alone...

I don't wish that scene will happen...

I don't wish to hear the same words i dreamt before...

Not because i'm reluctant to change ...

Just because i don't like changes in life...

Sunday

Eventually i did pass another day...

Awake and slept back and continues doing this....

Strangely or maybe nothing new to me...

5something only consider i'm totally awake..

Can't say so cause i'm the one forcing myself to do so...

My 1st and last meal at 6something...

Had alot of dreams...

Nice and bad one...

A moment there are a lot of people in my room...

The other second everyone is just shifting out...

Suddenly all alone...

Yea i know...

It's all sooner or later stuff...

Did some housework...

Pei Jun said," I feel like mopping the hall la..its dirty"...

I ate my food in the room and washed it...
Find the mop and start to mop my room...
Pei Jun said," I want to borrow 2 things from you".
"I know my bike and headset rite..just borrow and pump air for my bike."
Done with my room i start to mop the...
Staircase,both kitchens,dining room and the hall...
Next mission the toilet...
Ok finally all done...
It's a tiring stuff to do...

-THE END-

Bad ending

How should i describe today?

Began with good but ends with bad...

Again the question comes...

When will it ends?

Don't wish to stay here nor back there...

Makes no difference...

All by myself...

HEadache..

It flows too much...

Unstoppable...

I'm trying to control it....

p/s:that idiot shouldn't call if haven't confirm..i'm in the middle of nowhere again...*worry*

Release Me

I did tried to sleep as "old friends" visit me....

I try and try and try.....

Here I'm still awake...

Retro all over my mind and thinking how 2 make it perfect...

Am i too perfectionist or fussy....

No time to make it better...

Maybe i really just be cincai abit and hand it up...

Headache and chest pain right now...

Gosh...

I know i need to sleep...

Things just running in my mind...

For sure i'm going to get myself tired again....

Tue and Wed is the busiest day in Uni...

Haihz...

Oh~~please release me...let me go~~~

For i~Don't love you anymore~~

Autumn In My Heart

Suddenly feel like listening to these songs...

Suddenly wow flashing back to secondary time...

Prayer

Reason

a lil of everything

Funny when knew a friend have a blog...

Funny again i'm the only viewer and eventually she is blog to let me see...

Funny again that's the place she can release her anger...

But the not funny thing is i can't be there for her...

To be the bad person and scold that so called "roomate"

I'm doing nothing here just reader her blog nia...

Chille my darling...

40days to go and when you are back i sayang you kau kau...=)

Back to my story...

Illustrator ,reports and magazine...

Things that i did today...

Half done,some finish and still in process...

Pressure betul...

View my board..why always add things but never deduce things out 1...

Purchasing stuff at Tesco and suddenly felt unwell...

Pressure at my brain and feel like *don't know how to explain*

End this bad part...

Many things want to blog out...

But want to end it here because i'm abit emo...

Don't wish to make this post an emo 1...

-the end-

Promise

I hate to break promises i had made....

I don't know will it means so much to that person i promised...

Or maybe some words i said ...

How i wish i can duplicate myself to them...

Friends need me...

Wish i can be there for them...

Something holding me back...

Something need to be decide...

Priority comes 1st...

Things need to be judge due to it's importance...

Undecided decision....

P!NK and I

Damn tired....

Don's have to rest as my mind just full with assignments...

Tiredness all over me...

Comes with some msn message from a friend...

Maybe not really important to explain things...

Both parties understand can already...

Our friendship won't change due to such small matter...

Somehow did had a nice day for some bday celebration...

Laughter that just distress me for that moment...

Somehow how to back to reality and busyness...

Nevertheless skype with Evon and Lili...XD

Blasting myself with P!NK music...

Somehow is time to sleep...

Brain totally shut down and headache too...

Gnite....

Disappointed

What will you do when u disappointed with someone?

What will you do when at the same time you're so speechless?

Trying to be at someone's shoes too...

Nothing new...

Nobody is wrong at this case....

Just disappointed...

"Work" Mode

Really should start my work already....

RETRO here i come...

Be@rbrick here i come...

ASSIGNMENTS here i come....

GAZAA~~~!!!!!

KL here i come too...hahah.....

Expired...

All my expired bday presents and food...

Gosh it was a waste...

I thought want to keep it and just "bu shi de" to eat it..

=(

It's a sad discovery...

A Lonely Star

On the way back from dinner and realized there is only a star at the sky....

A lonely star that brighten the only spot at the sky....

Wandering how lonely it is...

As lonely as I do?

I just wish to be with my friends...

But neither them are by my side...

But neither them are by my side...

I miss you...

Hope you all can feel it from far...

Don't know what to do for this weekend...

Reluctant to do anything but have too...

Going to be busy very soon...

Somehow hope to be busy now...

Maybe I should prepare the individual presentation...

Will time flies for this weekend?

I wish it will...

Bad Starter

woke up at 8.30am,prepare and cycle to uni to summit my ptptn agreements..somehow it wasn't a good things as i need to reprint another set...O.O...walked to block B 2nd floor and reprint it..changed 4 computers and finally i managed to print it..i forgotten to bring the printing card and have to buy another one...haih...

new agreement without my parents signature...i have to trace and sign on behalf of my parents..my dad's signature is so hard to do it and obviously it's an ugly signature..hopefully won't be reject...*crossing fingers*...finally everything done and now wait them to give me the money...busy for the whole morning just to get those loan from the gov...haih...

since i'm already late for lecture class so i just skip it and went for blood donation...finally i can donate for today...phew~~...but bad news is the lecturer called names of her students and it's another so called bad reputation lecturer...really wish to save the skipping time for August 5th...try my best ba....

A Wake Up Sms

A shocking news that eventually become my wake up call for this morning..if not i'm sure still slacking and delaying my wake up time to 8am class..what can i say since is the calling from the God..thought she need me but she just need to go to uni to settle her stuffs...sorry to hear that early in the morning and sorry can't be there for you my friend...wish to give u my shoulder as i used to say it to you but never once i'm by ur side to borrow it to you...be strong as i know you will...=)...condolence to Chong's family....

to my friend,choy wan...

for this again i misses my grandparents as well...just that they doesn't managed to see everyone grows up but at least they managed to see all their grandchildren being born...

~The 2nd~

today is the 2nd day in my 2nd sem..still hardly wake up for the morning class..gosh..just when i want to wake up i felt my body is aching..still not enough rest? really no idea about it...2nd day and so far i have entered 2lectures and a tutorial class..yea so far i'm still free and kind of bored..wait till loaded with assignments and busy like hell...somehow,sometimes i do prefer like that, so that time will pass faster..

yesterday chat and webcam with my friend as usual..the funny thing is she wanted me to snap her with my dsl..lol...so i just did it...XD

Moving Forward

a friend of mine said her car never snap picture before..so i just roughly snap a few angles of her car..glad she is happy with it even though my skill wasn't that good...lol

Christopher Hibbert

Christopher Hibbert : photographie et light painting

Christopher Hibbert is a freenlancer photographer from Paris, France. He is an expert in light painting with an impressive portfolio full of very creative photos using this technique. Above is his site but it's in French so i just did the translation using google chrome. better than nothing.haha